"Never Have I Ever"

March 19, 2013

I remember playing the game “Never Have I Ever” in middle school and high school with my girlfriends (sans the alcohol) to get to know one another. Everyone starts with all ten fingers up, and the first person in the group says a simple statement starting with "Never have I ever".  Anyone who has done what the first player has not, puts a finger down. The next person makes a statement, and so on and so forth. The first person with no fingers remaining wins.  If I were to play with a group of native Ugandans, I’m pretty much guaranteed to lose.  

Never have I ever…

• Worried the government might invade my home and kill me and my family
• Experienced the death of a family member due to HIV/AIDS
• Been kidnapped to be offered up as a sacrifice
• As a pedestrian, been within inches of being hit by and oncoming vehicle
• Been placed in an orphanage
• Suffered from Malaria
• Seen a dead body lying on the side of the road on my way to school/work
• Been forced into prostitution as the only way to support my family
• Wondered where my next meal would come from

Sadly, the majority of the people I encountered in Uganda would put a finger down for at least one of those statements. After a week in Uganda, I am much more aware of how, by God’s grace, I am able to say “Never Have I Ever.”  But I wonder, have I truly been changed?  How long will it take before I slip right back into the complacency of a cushy life?  Sure, right now I’m acutely aware that I’m not truly hungry just because its 10am and I’m used to a mid-morning snack.  I’m sensitive to the high-quality healthcare we receive in the US, and I’m mindful that even the least-desirable orphanages in the US pale in comparison to the devastating environments some of the children in Uganda face.  At what point will my experiences that are vividly in the forefront of my mind become hazy memories of the past?  I know it can happen, but I pray that it won’t.  

I think the one key to being forever changed is to continually re-live the “culture shock” we experience. For me, it means prayerfully asking God to break my heart for a people that need Him. It means surrounding myself with individuals who are broken for the same people and things as me, and it means leaving my comfort zone in pursuit of the Holy Spirit.  In the end, that might mean I have to put a finger down in a nasty game of “Never Have I Ever,” but who ever said the life of a Christ-follower wouldn’t be messy?

Bethany Reavis